EPA: Renewable Energy Causes 104,412 Illnesses|Humor

EPA: Renewable Energy Causes 104,412 Illnesses|Humor

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The Environmental Protection Agency has released a new study that concludes renewable energy, specifically solar and wind generated power, can cause up to 104,412 illnesses. “(The EPA) just published a ground breaking report that clearly shows that the renewable energy that the Democrats have been pushing on us for so long is […]

“President Trump Fixes Earth” is #1 Show in the Alpha Centauri Galaxy|Humor

“President Trump Fixes Earth” is #1 Show in the Alpha Centauri Galaxy|Humor

“Award or no award, no one talks to the Galaxy Commander like that!” said Alpha Centauri’s press release. Washington, DC President Donald Trump was recently visited by a spaceship fron Alpha Centauri, to give him the Galaxy Award, an award to the top entertainment show in the (Alpha Centauri) galaxy. “Our people cannot get enough […]

Toddler’s reject offer of extra hour in bed|Humor

Toddler’s reject offer of extra hour in bed|Humor

Britain’s under threes have welcomed the end of British Summer Time by waking up even earlier than usual on purpose. As the nation’s clocks went back, toddlers across the country deliberately set their body clocks forward an hour in a synchronised display of abject bastardry. Father of two-year-old twins, Nick Ferguson, said: “My son woke […]

All Men Will Now Be Required to Wear Body Cameras|Humor

All Men Will Now Be Required to Wear Body Cameras|Humor

What about your dad? Your grandfather? WORLD- Following the explosive revelations about movie mogul Harvey Weinstein’s years of predatory sexual behavior, the virality of assault victim hashtag #Metoo, and the growing number of other men being outed as sexual predators, the World has decided to pass legislation stating that all men will now be forced […]

Trump to undergo pioneering ‘own ass extraction surgery’|Humor

Trump to undergo pioneering ‘own ass extraction surgery’|Humor

Donald Trump has been rushed to hospital in Washington to undergo emergency pioneering ‘own ass extraction surgery’. It’s understood he was taken ill in the Oval Office when drafting a raft of executive orders against some people who mildly disagree with him. Medics were called and Mr Trump was rushed to St Olaf’s Medical Centre, […]

Fart in a Jar Prank Unappreciated by Coworkers|Humor

Fart in a Jar Prank Unappreciated by Coworkers|Humor

EVANSVILLE, IN – A local man’s “fart in a jar” office prank was not well received by his coworkers. “I just wanted to make people laugh, you know, and I thought it would be funny if I went and I took one of them jars in the cafeteria and I farted in it, sealed it […]

Does this Panda Hold the Key to Faster-Than-Light Travel?|Humor

Does this Panda Hold the Key to Faster-Than-Light Travel?|Humor

ATLANTA, GA – The internet has been going crazy with speculation that Ya Lun, a Giant Panda at the Atlanta Zoo, may hold the key to faster-than-light (FTL) space travel. Interest in the Panda and FTL travel started earlier this month when an Instagram user posted a photo of Ya Lun with the caption “Dis […]

Parents prepare to tell kids Toys ‘R’ Us doesn’t exist|Humor

Parents prepare to tell kids Toys ‘R’ Us doesn’t exist|Humor

Millions of parents are set to face an awkward conversation this Christmas as they reveal to their kids that the retail giant Toys ‘R’ Us is not real. Though its full origins are shrouded in mystery, it is thought the toy conglomerate as we know it today derived from stories of Saint Geoffrey, a fourth […]

Ten Ways to Make Yourself More Efficient at Work|Humor

Ten Ways to Make Yourself More Efficient at Work|Humor

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – With the job market becoming increasingly competitive, being a good employee that works hard and works efficiently is more important than ever. Companies are always looking to reduce waste and get as much out of employees as legally possible so replacing below average, or even average employees with super-efficient robots is […]

Washington dog pound mutts breath sighs of relief after Trump snub

Washington dog pound mutts breath sighs of relief after Trump snub

Following the decision by President Trump not to have a pet in the Whitehouse, Washington’s stray dog community has breathed a collective sigh of relief. None more so than two terrified Washington dog pound residents, Coco the Mexican Chihuahua and Abdul the Afghan hound. Both have now come out of hiding, and have taken their […]