Stan Bridgewater regrets the set of dumbells that he bought from Argos three days before the country went into Lockdown.

‘They just sit there in the lounge, mocking my pipe-cleaner arms. I swore that, by the time Lockdown was lifted, I would be able to beat Brian Asshat at arm-wrestling, and then maybe Tracey would acknowledge me, but it looks like that is not going to be happening.’

The troubled 47-year-old character went on: ‘Do you know in Superman II, when he goes back to the diner, and beats up the man, and says at the end that he has been working out? Well, I wanted a scene like that, and Tracey would look over and think, phwoar, there’s the man for me.’

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